Telling Someone You're a Writer...

Telling people you are a writer is nothing to be ashamed about. Or talking about your progress towards publication. It's part of the job. Writers understand that this is a process. Others don't get it.

Here's what can happen when you talk about it to non-writers.

Years ago, I had told close friends that I finally got an agent, an important step towards getting my novel published. They were happy for me and we went out to dinner to celebrate.

Months later, over dinner at the same favourite Italian restaurant, the woman asked me whether I had sold my novel yet.

"No," I replied, "my agent is sending it out to editors."

"Still?"

Another time we ran into an acquaintance we hadn't seen in years. He asked me what was new. I told him I had self-published a book of poetry. 

He immediately asked me, "How many copies did you sell?" 

I was trying to come up with an answer when he added, "How much money did you make?"

People don't think it's rude to ask you these kinds of questions if you're in the arts, the same way it's rude to ask a doctor or lawyer how much they make.

The consequence was I regretted ever telling him. 

I had accomplished lots of things to be proud of: writing a book; hiring a cover designer, logo designer, and proofreader; forming a company; dealing with the IRS and Amazon, etc. But those didn't count--to him.

Lawyers never have to talk about all the cases they lost. You're a lawyer! You must be smart and successful! people think.

But a writer who doesn't make it to the bestseller list? 

People think, or say, "It's nice to have a hobby. I'd write a book, too, but I don't have the time."

Like Rodney Dangerfield, we get no respect.